Happy Baby Corner: returning to work

Going back to work after having a baby can be traumatic for mums. As part of our Happy Baby Corner Series, we’re sharing our tips for returning to work after having a baby.

Happy Baby Corner: breastfeeding support groups

Our Baby and Breastfeeding Encouragement and Support groups (known as BABES groups) offer a welcoming atmosphere for all mums who breastfeed.

Happy Baby Corner: introducing solid foods

As part of our Happy Baby Corner series, we’re sharing some top tips for successful weaning.

Introducing solid foods is an important step in your baby’s development. It can be an exciting milestone but for many mums it also brings with it some anxieties and worries - am I giving him the correct foods? Will she choke? What if he won’t eat? Is she eating too much? Should I still give him milk?

Happy Baby Corner: concerns of a breastfeeding mum

Starting to breastfeed can be a difficult time. You’re tired and emotional and then your new baby decides it’s time to feed, feed…and feed again!

As part of our new Happy Baby Corner series, Alison Jee, Infant Feeding Lead for the Trust, shares some of the most common concerns of a new breastfeeding mum and some tips for overcoming them.

“Health visitors are a lifeboat in the stormy days of having a new baby.”

As a doctor, Lucy knew all about the role of health visitors. However, it wasn’t until she became a mum herself that she realised just how important their work really was.

At seven-weeks-old Lucy’s daughter, Rosie, was diagnosed with an inguinal hernia which occurs when fatty tissue or part of the bowel pokes through into the groin. Shortly afterwards, Rosie underwent an operation to have her hernia repaired.

It was a difficult time for Lucy, who found support not only from her family, but from her local health visitor too.

“Nicola had been helping me with breastfeeding Rosie because she had lost a lot of weight following her birth” recalls Lucy. “When I showed her the hernia, she was reassuring and kind, which was just what I needed."

All you need to know about potty training

Most families will experience the ups and downs of potty training at one time or another. Nicola Lilley, a health visitor with the Trust, gave us her top tips for toilet training.

Wait until they are ready

Don’t feel pressured to start toilet training if you do not feel your child is ready. Toilet training is more likely to be successful if you let your child set the pace. If your child isn’t ready, success will take longer and the likelihood of accidents is greater.

When are children ready to toilet train?

There is no right age to start toilet training. Most children are around two-years-old but many are nearer three-years-old before they start showing signs of being ready.

"I never expected to get the care that we did. Nicola was fantastic!"

When Gina, mum to two-year-old Cleo, contacted her local health visitor for help with potty training, she wasn’t sure what to expect. However, after a few visits from Nicola, a health visitor with the Trust, Gina soon realised she’d get more than she expected.

“My GP suggested I contact my health visitor” explains Gina, “because Cleo was struggling to poo on the potty. I didn’t know what to expect from Nicola, but I didn’t think we’d get anything like the one-to-one care that we did. She was fantastic."

“The support group helped me realise I wasn't alone. And I was doing a good job!”

Nicole, 37, always knew she wanted to breastfeed. Her mum had breastfed her, and Nicole had already done the same with her three sons. 

However, when she had her fourth child, Scarlett, breastfeeding didn’t go quite as well as she expected.

After finding support at her local breastfeeding support group, run by the Trust, Nicole is now sharing her story seven months on, to encourage other mums who are struggling to access the help that’s available.

“The first few weeks were very hard and draining” Nicole explains. “Scarlett had lost a lot of weight and wanted to be fed constantly. My husband and sons helped around the house so I could concentrate on feeding Scarlett, but I was tired and upset, and I felt I was failing her.

“When the Health Visitor came to visit, she referred Scarlett to a pediatrician to check everything was ok. The pediatrician said Scarlett was doing everything she should be doing. She told me breastfed babies should have a different chart in the red book to formula-fed babies as they digest breast milk easier, so feed more often, and some babies may take a little longer before they begin to follow the weight chart."

11 top tips for successful breastfeeding

Breastfeeding offers both you and your baby so many health benefits, as well as creating a really strong bond between you.

Breastfed babies are five times less likely to suffer tummy bugs and urine infections, and two times less likely to suffer from ear infections. Mums have a lower risk of breast and ovarian cancer, and will burn up to 500 calories per day.

As part of Breastfeeding Celebration Week, we spoke to mums and breastfeeding support workers to find out their top tips.

“Breastfeeding doesn’t come naturally to all mums. Some of us need a bit more support!”

For Charlotte, 30, memories of breastfeeding her first baby were tinged with sadness. After three weeks struggling to feed her newborn son, she made the difficult decision to stop. It’s something she has always regretted.

But, when she had her second baby, Jacob, last year, she decided to give breastfeeding another go, this time armed with support from her local breastfeeding support group, run by the Trust. 

Now, over a year later, Charlotte is sharing her breastfeeding story, to encourage other mums who are struggling to access the help that’s available.

“The first few weeks were very difficult” Charlotte explains. “Jacob was a ‘sleepy feeder’ and would take up to an hour to feed – and then he’d be hungry again an hour later. Not ideal with having a toddler too. I had very painful nipples. And then developed mastitis as well, which was extremely painful. When the Health Visitor came to visit one day, I was so upset I just burst into tears. I was already struggling – this was the last thing I needed!"

“I never thought I’d be a Mum who went to groups, but I wouldn’t be without my boob group now!”

Hannah, 32, always knew she wanted to breastfeed but, during the first few days of motherhood, it didn’t go quite as she’d hoped.

However, after finding support at her local breastfeeding group, run by the Trust, Hannah is now sharing her story to encourage other mums who are struggling to access the help that’s available.

At a few days old, Hannah’s new son, Isaac, was admitted to hospital with weight loss after struggling to latch on. It was a hard time for new parents Hannah and Simon. “The first few weeks were very difficult” Hannah explains. “I felt guilty for not being able to provide what Issac needed. Feeding was painful. And the struggle affected my relationship with Simon – he wanted to start formula feeding, so we could see how much Isaac was having. But I was determined to succeed at breastfeeding! I wasn’t ready to give up.”

How to keep your kids on the nice list

Christmas with kids is supposed to be one of the best parts of being a parent. But a change of routine, arguing over presents and over-indulgence can all make your child’s behaviour a Christmas nightmare.

Kate Simpson - Early Years Specialist Practitioner, and Fran Breed - Health and Family Support Worker, from Sure Start, gave us their top tips on managing your child’s behaviour at Christmas.

Stick to your routine

It’s difficult with so much going on, but try to stick to your routine as much as possible. This will help you keep a sense of normality and show that your normal rules still apply.

If children are staying with grandparents or with their other parent, have discussions beforehand on how you manage behaviour so that it’s consistent for your child.

Encourage sharing

With all those new toys, there are bound to be disagreements!

It’s natural for young children to think of themselves, so they find the concept of sharing very difficult. Don’t expect young children to want to share their brand new toy – we wouldn’t want to share our Christmas gifts!

Be realistic with your expectations, and give children time to enjoy their gifts before expecting them to share.

You can encourage sharing by setting a time limit using visuals. For example, say ‘when the big hand on the clock gets to the top’, use an egg timer if you have one or set the alarm on your phone. Give lots of praise for sharing and lead by example.

Use praise and positive language

If you only give your child attention for negative behaviour, it’s easy to see why they might want to act up. Try to stay positive, and make sure you notice the good things.

Your time is the best gift

It might sound cheesy, but your presence really is the best present. Children still need quality one to one time, otherwise negative behaviour will present itself.

Choose your battles

Behaviour will be different due to tiredness, being over excited and too much sugar. Keep this in mind and try to have realistic expectations over the Christmas period.

Stay calm and smile!

Don’t put pressure on yourself for everything to be perfect - the things which go wrong can end up being the best family stories!

Try to stay calm and enjoy yourself, and you’ll find everyone ends up in a better mood.


If you’re still struggling with your child’s behaviour after Christmas, you can get advice from your local Sure Start centre. 

4 ways to get your child to sleep

If your child has trouble sleeping, it’s an issue which can affect the whole family. Sleep is so important to our wellbeing, and we really feel it when we’re not getting enough.

Sam Parr, Health and Family Support Worker at Carlton Children’s Centre, gave us her advice for a good night’s sleep. So if bed time is a daily battle, or your child isn’t sleeping well, these tips should help:

1. Avoid sugar and caffeine

Caffeine can make it hard to get to sleep, so avoid things like chocolate, coffee and tea.

Sugar filled foods are not helpful either, so biscuits, sweets and cakes should be limited in the run up to bedtime.

If your child wets the bed, it could be because fizzy drinks and cordials can aggravate the bladder. Switch to a small drink of water for a dry night.

2. Switch off

Avoid stimulating activities before bedtime such as watching television or playing computer games.

As well as stopping your child from winding down, light from screens is also known to affect children’s sleep.

Try a relaxing activity instead, such as reading a book or a having a warm bath.

3. Be clear about bed time

Be clear and explain to your child what’s happening. Telling them, “it’s night time, go to sleep” or, “it’s morning, time to wake up” can help them understand what’s going on.

Put your child in their cot or bed when they are still awake and leave them to fall asleep. Staying with them can be a distraction.

4. Stick to your routine

Giving your child a routine is really important for a good night’s sleep. It helps their brain and body clock to know when it’s time to go to sleep, and when it’s time to wake up.

Tips for a good routine:

• Put your child to bed at the same time each day.
• Get them up at the same time each morning, even on weekends.

Clothes and pyjamas are part of a good routine, too. Always change your child’s clothes at night time and make sure that you change them into day clothes in the morning, even if you have nothing planned and a pyjama day would be easier.

Still having problems?

If you need support with your child’s sleep, contact your local Sure Start Centre. You can find more information and contact details on the Sure Start page of our website.

You can also get advice from The Children's Sleep Charity.

“Why do I need a Befriender? I’ve got friends, I’ve got family. How can they help me?”

For Alexandra, 31, from Eastwood, the first few months of motherhood didn’t go quite as she’d hoped. However, after finding support from a local befriending service, Alexandra is now sharing her story, encouraging other families who are struggling to access the help that's available.

At six-months-old, Alexandra’s son, Cal, was admitted to hospital as the result of a severe milk allergy; a condition that can cause diarrhoea and vomiting, skin rashes and difficulty breathing. In rare cases, it can also result in anaphylactic shock, a potentially life-threatening allergic reaction. At around the same time as his hospitalisation, Cal also developed a hernia which, after a long wait, eventually led to surgery.

All this took its toll on new mum Alexandra, who was eventually prescribed anti-depressants by her GP. He also suggested she try the Perinatal Befriending Programme, run by Nottinghamshire Children and Families Partnership, part of Nottinghamshire Healthcare.

“I went to my doctor and said ‘I think there’s something wrong with me’” Alexandra explains. “Feeding Cal was like force-feeding. I feared he’d go back into hospital. I was anxious that he wasn’t getting enough milk. Doctors told me ‘try not to let him cry too much, because his hernia may pop out.’ It was exhausting. Mentally, I couldn’t cope.

“I lost the confidence to go out, it was just too stressful. I felt I had no one to talk to. I was really isolated.

“When my doctor first suggested it, I thought: ‘Why do I need a befriender? I’ve got friends, I’ve got family. How is that going to deal with what I’m going through?’ But, I gave it some thought and decided to give it a try."

Soon after, Alexandra was paired with Emily and, from then on, things slowly started improving for Alexandra and Cal.

“After her first few visits, I began to look forward to Emily visiting. She had experienced many of the same issues I had; it was so reassuring to talk to someone who knew how I felt! 

"It was baby steps at first; a walk round the block, then to the local park and, eventually, into town. She went with me to groups so that I wasn’t sitting on my own. She introduced me to other parents. If Cal got upset, she’d remind me ‘it’s ok if he cries.’ She’d recognise if I was struggling and say ‘let’s go.’ She wasn’t too pushy. Some health professionals tend to dictate, but Emily would just suggest ideas. She always let me choose.

“Slowly, my confidence built up. The anxiety, the nerves, all calmed down. And, as soon as I calmed down, so did Cal. Having Emily around helped me to relax.

“Now, things are improving each day. And Cal is eating me out of house and home! Weaning has been a challenge but I’m slowly introducing him to new foods. I’ve started a new job and I’m looking forward to enjoying him this Christmas, without worrying about feeding and hernias! I’ve got a bit more of a spring in my step. I’m slowly coming off my anti-depressants and by next year, I want to be off them completely.”

For more information about Perinatal Support Services, contact your GP, Health Visitor or local Children's Centre Coordinator.